Saturday, March 28, 2009


While in Jerome at the gallery yesterday I was overwhelmed with feelings of insecurity and wonder regarding if I was on the right path, if I was doing the right thing "trying to be an artist". Everyone was selling so much more work than me, succeeding so much more than me. I felt depressed and wondered what is it going to take? What is this secret formula I seem unable of possessing?
Why doesn't everyone like me??? Notice I said me and not my work. Why are we so hard on ourselves and seemingly ready at a moments notice to throw ourselves under the bus? Why is it so hard to believe in ourselves?

This kind of thinking and wallowing doesn't happen to me that often so I think I take it particularly hard when it does. Today of course was a different story. I went outside with my coffee and looked at the beautiful blue sky and marveled at how nice it was without 50 mph winds and thought; okay- what's the plan?

The nature of creativity alone is a topic, but once you add pricing, selling and the "audience factor" you can really screw yourself up. I reminded myself of one of my favorite quotes on the subject- "Through the work comes the work." In other words, get busy.
This is your job. Just make it. The rest will sort itself out.

Please check out this talk by Elizabeth Gilbert who wrote Eat, Pray, Love. It's very inspiring, but it's about 20 minutes so be ready to sit down and contemplate.


  1. I imagine it would be unpleasant to create art with the audience factor in mind? And perhaps it is that which seeds the doubt. If the audience doesn't like the art then it must be 'wrong', and so must we be for believing otherwise.

    Your shit kicks arse though, so keep on rocking it. To hell with the audience. :)

  2. I have those moments too Megan.....

    No worries. They pass. And you do great work, and you know it! :)

  3. You tread a very dangerous path when you jump to comparing yourself to other NEVER works out for the best, unless it happens to inspire you to do something...but, often we're left with such a bad taste in our mouths when we compare. I think we all do it as well...I usually have an inner dialogue with myself going at most times. I am trying to be more gentle with myself though...and realizing that I bring my own special creativity to the world...I speak in my own voice. Just like you do. And the world is such a better place for it...